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Is the drug epidemic in America part of the Agenda 21 movement?

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Can you handle the truth? The only solution to end addiction
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Erin SFYB Sr Business Dev Executive

We are all here in this addiction community for a reason, to help others escape the death grip that addiction grabs us with. The hold that causes people to do things that negate every moral fiber they have; to lie, cheat, steal and possibly to even murder. Does any other disease cause this to happen? No, because addiction is a spiritual attack that leaves us open for the devils invasion.

  Let me explain further, first you must understand that no disease is normal for the human body. They have all been engineered to make us vulnerable and to keep the population under control. Every disease also has a cure, however, you will never get it because that is not how this world works

This is satan’s realm and whether you choose to believe it or not he is very real…just as real as God

If you read The Book of Revelations (name change….mandela effect) you would soon realize that every event foretold in the bible is taking place right now as we fast approach the end of satan’s rule.

 How does addiction fit into this plan? Have you heard of a plague? Something that takes large numbers of us very quickly, what is the number 1 cause of death worldwide? Yes, addiction.

 You must understand that the deceptions in this world go deeper than you can ever imagine, we will suffice it to say that almost everything you believe to be true is a lie. I can tell you that I mean LITERALLY EVERYTHING. We are manipulated and indoctrinated from birth in an effort to pull us all from God and He is our true savior and Creator. There is no other answer for us.

 I do not expect a hands up in the air “hallelujah” here, I expect each and every one of you who reads this to research on your own. Contact me for where/how to search everything I am going to tell you, but it is all out there, YouTube is an invaluable resource but it is quickly being censored because too many of us are being awakened. The narrowgateweb.com has an EXCELLENT series that will take you through everything you need to begin this journey.

Agenda 21 is a very detailed plan put together by the elite who do satan’s bidding, this includes the governments  in each and every country.

It goes into great detail on how to knock our numbers down very quickly to implement the New World Order, satan’s plan to get us all to bow and worship him, forsaking God.

 However, God is not ignoring this, He is fighting back through those of us who have been awakened. I am not privy as to why I have been one of those chosen. I only know with every fiber in my soul that I have been and it only began with my sons death from a heroin OD. I didn’t choose this, hell, I didn’t even know it was an option until things started happening in my life that had no explanation, supernatural things that left me absolutely no doubt to God’s existence, and as the months have passed the downloads of knowledge that I did not possess on my own have continued.

As I began to tirelessly research each new subject I suddenly Knew, with no prior knowledge.

 I was astonished to find out how deep I understood every subject now in my brain, it turns out as I am connected each day to hundreds of others who have also been awakened, that God is awakening us…just as predicted in the bible, because WE are the answer, each and every one of us.

How does this affect us in the recovery community collectively? Are  you watching this community? The infighting? The personal attacks? The segregation, and discrimination in groups? This is called “divide and conquer” and it is working, because while we are busy pointing fingers at each other, treatment centers, businesses, advocates and even God we are playing right into their hands. And let me tell you….some of the pot stirrers are working for the other side, have no doubt about that. We all need to come together and understand that until we truly come together to fight the real cause of this we are only spinning our wheels. Drugs are manufactured, paid for and distributed by the government itself, that is why there is no great outcry to stop any of this.

You may be able to attack a part at your local government level but the drugs are still being pumped onto the streets by the elite who consist of the government and the controlling elite ie: The Rothschilds, The Rockefellers, The freemasons, Zionists, Skull and Bones society, satanists and luciferians as well as a host more of secret societies.

The answer is God, it always has been. If we all come together in His name then satan has no power.

He only wields power where we give it up. Our free will defeats him. God gave all of us that gift, the right to choose good or evil, unfortunately so many have followed satan’s pretty promises that never work out as we had thought for there is a price you pay for playing with him. Only God can give us the most beautiful lives we imagine and try to achieve without Him in our lives. This isn’t about religion (research religions, the pope and the vatican) it is about God and a personal relationship with Him.

 What I am seeing here is escalating every single day. Group admins who don’t want ads, treatment centers or God in their groups. Advocates turning on each other. Rumors, attacks, behind the scene drama that distracts and divides even further. My point is that how are we really helping those looking for help if we are so rolled up in controlling what others think. Not one of us will reach everyone, we all have different personalities and do not fit with everyone else. Who is to say that someone will not find success somewhere that we don’t personally approve of? That someone may not need to see something or connect with someone whom they will bond with and find recovery with. It is like a game of Red Rover, if our arms are not linked tightly together then people will fall through the lines.

I truly could go on for days but I think I have left you all with enough homework and food for thought. If we truly want to end this, true Unity with GOD is the only way we are going to do that because every other solution brings us right back to the people doing this to us, we are victims in a very real, very scary game.

 I truly love each and every one of you. God bless.

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Overdose deaths have become almost commonplace now. It’s every day that it is seen in the headlines.
erinkberndt

Erin Berndt SFYB Admin

From the rich and famous, to the homeless, substance abuse disorder does not discriminate. Overdose deaths have surpassed both car accident related and gun shot wound fatalities.

There is already an awful stigma attached here. Addicts are judged strictly by society and this makes seeking recovery a less than sought after reality for so many.Yesterday, it was released that a councilman in Ohio has asked that EMS stop responding to Overdose calls!
What????

The reason behind this person’s request is money. Apparently they didn’t budget their Narcan costs to the demand and their $10,000 budget has soared to $100,000. So, this man has decided that to save money he would like the EMS to just ignore calls on victims that have previously overdosed. He looks at it as a “scare tactic”.

“Sir”, addicts aren’t afraid of dying! Every time they use they play a game of Russian roulette. What does this accomplish? Where is the line drawn? No more treatment for lung cancer attributed to cigarettes or cirrhosis due to alcohol?

Overdose deaths have become almost commonplace now. By Erin Berndt Click to Tweet

Should funeral homes stop providing funerals? Perhaps shameful mass burying would better suit these people you would like to sweep under the rug?

It is sad truth that the pharmaceutical companies have created these drugs in the first place and continue to push them for profits. Now the government is trying to step in and regulate whether or not they deem a life is worthy? This is capital punishment. No crime, no trial, no jury! This is playing God. This is not solving anything. This is so very wrong!

People with substance abuse disorder are still PEOPLE! They are still worthwhile. They still deserve the same human rights that each and every one of us do. As long as society keeps stigmatising, pointing fingers and trying to remove the PEOPLE instead of the DISORDER this problem will continue to grow. So much more is needed here. More education. More awareness. More attention. More affordable treatment options.

That damn stupid Stop Frying Your Brain song kept rattling around in my head after visiting their website. It was worse than it’s a small world at Disneyland. Eventually… I would hook up with those guys and it’s all because of that one stupid song. Thanks guys you changed my life.

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On August 28, 2016, just after midnight my phone rang, it was the call I KNEW would be coming. The call I had moved 1200 miles trying to outrun. My 25 yr old son Anthony had overdosed on heroin and lost his life.

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As I said, I didn’t think this was going to happen, I KNEW IT WAS GOING TO. It doesn’t prepare you in any way when it comes though, that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier to accept. It is far worse than the imagination can create and is truly something no parent should ever have to go through. I didn’t scream at God, try to bargain or bemoan the unfairness of the reality.

 

My 25 yr old son Anthony had overdosed on heroin and lost his life by: Erin Berndt Click to Tweet

Instead, my only thought was in desperately needing to know that God had my son, that he was safe in heaven.

Even though I had not been the most faithful servant and had spent my life believing that my own life choices had earned me a place in hell, the most important thing in my life had become the obsessive need to make sure my son had made it into heaven.

The 28th was a Sunday and on Monday night I was crying to my husband that I still had not received a sign that He had my son. My husband, knowing how my son and I would watch the birds when he was younger, told me to watch my birdfeeders, that that is how my sign would come. The next morning, for the first time in my life, I saw a huge bald eagle swoop down from the heavens and I knew my son had earned his wings.

Later in the day when I shared this with my daughter she exclaimed “omg Mom, there was an eagle flying over my car yesterday” (1200 miles away).

On Wednesday my 6 yr old grandson, Anthony’s son saw one at his bus stop and on Thursday morning, Anthony’s girlfriend and her mother saw one in yet another separate town. My son’s death also helped me escape a 10 yr stint on 13 different prescriptions and I was able to completely quit cold turkey, finally accepting 4 mos later that I had been battling my own addiction silently.

After realizing fully that there is indeed a God and that He truly loves us ALL, I knew that I needed to become involved in something bigger than myself, that somehow I needed to make a difference and prove to the world that addicts are no less than any other person in this world. I needed an outlet, I needed to be involved, I needed to prove to them that they are so much more than they believe.

That they haven’t been written off and forgotten. That recovery is possible. That pasts don’t matter to God. That everything they think is unforgivable inside of them is just their own fears and not based in any truth.

I started Holy Spirit Recovery for exactly that reason, to help addicts, parents, siblings, spouses and even friends to understand that addiction isn’t a choice and it does not negate anyone’s future capabilities. I started in the hopes that in my future I would be able to reach an even higher calling, to directly impact lives on a daily basis.

To provide hope and instill in all that God loves us equally despite our pasts. My plans are to continue to help anyone who needs my help in any way from finding rehab for a loved one to just being a kind word that someone desperately needs to hear. My son’s death was not in vain and as I work my way toward the future I am confidant that someday I will find a way to help ensure that everyone who needs treatment is able to find it and afford it!

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I thought my father was Evil… Chapter 6

Evil Dad

erinkberndt

Loving Mom

When Dick & I had broken up, there had been so many fights & regrets. I was already wishing I had not chosen to be w him because he terrified me. He had a very tough guy reputation at 19 yrs old, There were other girls. Lies. Oh but the sex, that was great.

I was happy & content living w my Mom & Butch, he was a great man. I found some babysitting work in Fitchburg, Dick’s best friends, brother & his wife. They had 3 kids & I spent a lot of time w them throughout the pregnancy.

Dick didn’t do much for the baby at all while I was pregnant. I went to school & tried my hardest to make sure I graduated, to give my baby the best possible life I could as a single mom. I’m remembering now, after mom had left & before I was thrown out, that is when Dick broke up w me. He’s always had “great timing”. i was devastated at first, inconsolable. My best friend narya was mad at me, because I had slept w her boyfiend before she met him, so I really had no one to go through this with, & Dad, HA-HA. He had no clue how to deal w me, so he called Gramma. I remember so well, her saying, “Honey, it’s ok, you’re better off without him. I’ve seen the way he looks at you & he doesn’t look at you with love in his eyes”. I accepted that then & for far too long! The truth is the truth, even if you refuse to believe it.

I thought my father was Evil... Chapter 6 Click to Tweet

Althea thought I would have a boy & Rocky would have a girl, she was so good to us during my pregnancy, she bought a high chair, playpen, clothes & bedding. Dick delivered them. While i planned mine & what I was positive would be my daughter’s future, Dick partied & slept w girls much younger than even me.
My Mom & step dad helped a lot too. my step dads youngest daughter Tina & I became close, she had a 9 mo old daughter herself & was a year younger than me. She gave me all of her daughter Ashley,s clothes. They were beautiful. My Mom never thought to throw me a shower, but then again, she was estranged from my Dad & that side of the family as well as her own. Our friend Kerry threw me & Rocky a shower. Just us & about 6 friends. She did a great job, but it was nothing like what Rocky’s family did for her.

evil dad 1

I did everything right throughout my pregnancy, eating right, exercising, no drugs or alcohol. I continued on with school. Sometime near graduation time, Narya “forgave” me & we picked up our friendship just as it had been. I didn’t go to Senior Prom, Dick wouldn’t take me & the 30 yr old My Mom was pushing me on was more than willing to take me. I refused, worried everyone would think that he was the father of my baby.
Pregnancy changed the way people treated me, even though that should have solidified my “slut” status. Yet, girls were so much kinder, a few speaking to me for the first time in 12 yrs. Others helping me if I happened to miss a class.

I made it & graduated from high school 6 mos. pregnant. Mom & Butch were there, but no one else. Even though the high school was only a mile from my Dad’s house. He did not come. I had been visiting Gramma & grampa after school when I would have an OB class after school & wait for Mom to pick me up after work to catch a ride back to Fitchburg. They gave me a $100 for graduation. I was so proud to be able to buy Gabrielle, after my friend who had died in *th grade, a car seat bumper pad & sheets for her crib. even though I didn’t have one at that point.

evil man

Dick was supposed to have been at graduation, it hurt so bad that he couldn’t even bother to show. Not the first nor last time a major event would be missed by him. He did end up buying the crib the people I was babysitting for had used for their 3 kids & I was happy w that & he bought the mattress. That’s it.
Just before my due date of August 1, 1988, I was at my grandparent’s house & my father showed up. That was the day that he told me he loved me for the FIRST time in my life. He asked me to move back home & take care of my brothers & he would help me w the baby. I talked to Mom & we agreed this was the best move for me. The family I had been babysitting for moved me down 3 flights of stairs 25 miles back to Athol & up 2 flights, provided the truck & charged me nothing. They were so good to me.

Chapter #1  My Nightmare Turned Miracle (The beginning)
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My Descent Into Hell

Hell

erinkberndt

Loving Mom

So it was, that I headed to Winchendon to meet the girl’s new love interests. I was extremely happy w my Boyfriend in VT. he was 5 yrs older, had a great job, treated me well & we had been together for about 6 mos. Minus the break up time, when he refused to take me to my Junior Prom.

 I went to Winchendon, having no idea that the ride I was making would become my future, the one I would spend 22 yrs trying to escape.

 We ended up at a decent home, This was where Rocky & Janes new men lived. It was their parents 2nd home & the 2 of them rented it. I met Frank & Dick. Rocky & Frank seemed very happy, but Dick didn’t really go near Jane all that much. When we left Jane had us all yell “we love you dick”. Dick got my number from Rocky & started calling me. I kept telling him he was supposed to like Jane. Unfortunately, he did not. Why o Why, is hindsight 20/20? They really deserved each other,

My Descent Into Hell Chapter 5 Click to Tweet

 Everytime we went to Winchendon, Dick would find me & when I was home he’d be calling me. What I would’ve done then, had the term Stalker been defined back then, we’ll never know. I was instead flattered by all the attention, so much so, that I called my bf in VT & ended it. He was upset & sarcastically said ‘Is it because we fight so much?” he was right, we didn’t fight. everything was good, but Dick had me intrigued. The irony was that I ended up reconnecting w the old bf on fb just a couple of mos ago. He didn’t remember saying that, but it had stuck in my head because it turned out that that was the truth. i equated love w violence. That thin line between love & hate.

 I was going camping in the State Park, Lake Dennison, when Dick offered to come get me since Rocky & Jane were already at the campsite. I didn’t make it to the campsite that night. Dick kissed me on the beach in a beautiful, romantic setting, our 1 st kiss. Honestly, it was bad, no stars, so spark, nothing. He was an awful kisser & that should have been enough to stop me. Nope, not me, too self conscious of what he’s going to think of me if I try to go. I stay & have sex w him, surprisingly that was good, really good & that’s where he had me.

hell 1

 He dropped me off at his house & I became his girlfriend. Mom, was having an affair while Dad was at work, so I used that to blackmail her into letting me spend weekends at Dick’s. I was working so he would drop me  off & pick me up. He was a true partier. 3 weeks into our relationship we got in a huge fight at a big party. some girl wanted to beat me up over him & really I don’t remember much, except that he sided with her & made me sleep on his bedroom floor that night! There were always girls in & out of his house, always excuses about who they were.We made it 3 months w him bragging he wanted a baby & to spend the rest of his life w me. He’d been saying I love you since the 2nd night together. I got pregnant fast, at first he was excited. Rocky & Frank were expecting too.

 I’m going to tell you more about Frank & Dick’s family. They had a very successful porta potty business, Frank Pygmy  Sr. had been raised poor & built himself a lucrative business. he was married to his 2nd wife Althea. Frank Sr’s 1st wife had given him 4 boys & Althea had given him 4 girls. The youngest was only 3 when I first met them. In the beginning they were very welcoming & I was very comfortable w them. Frank Sr always scared me, he reminded me of my own father, as he had shown up to fight w Dick on a couple of occasions & then kicked us out into the night, to find sleep elsewhere, even though Dick paid rent. He always told me horror stories of how Althea beat the boys, didn’t let them eat w her girls, or shower in her shower, they had to use the creepy cellar instead. He told of beatings & torment as bad as mine.  Then there was the fact that his real mother had not been seen since his 3rd birthday. He was 19 & I was 17.

 He broke up w me shortly after we found out I was pregnant, he changed his mind….yeah & was screwing every under age girl he could. I spent my pregnancy away from him & saw little of him. I did date some while i was pregnant

hell 2

 When my mother had to finally tell my father I was pregnant, home suddenly got really bad, Mom had met someone & she ended up leaving me & the boys alone w him. I was pregnant so there wasn’t anything else he had to worry about me, I was dating & going to parties, sober. One night he had come home drunk & my friend Olivia had been living w us, we were heading out w a guy I was dating & his friend, who was black. Besides, being an asshole, my father was also, very racist. He tried to stop us from leaving. I went anyway, thinking I would come home a little late & he’d be out cold  & not even remember what had happened.

 I couldn’t have been farther from the truth, we got home late & the house was pitch black & dead quiet. We slipped in the front door & the living room light clicked on. There sat my deepest fear, evil glowing in his drunken red eyes. Hatred seeping from him in pools. He stood up & said “You both get the fuck out of my house, you,”he pointed at Olivia, “you have half an hour to pack your shit”. “You”, me now. “you have an hour to pack your shit & get the fuck out of my house”.

 We were out in the dark @2 am, trying to get somewhere. Olivia’s Mom came & got her. I had to swallow my pride & call my mom & her new boyfriend. They came right away from 30 miles & picked me up & took me in. He was a great man, treated my mom like a queen. Living w them was peaceful. They had a Bait & Tackle Shop that I happily ran on the weekends so they could have a life. Plus I was paid & buying things for the little miracle I was growing.

 

Chapter #6 My Evil Father

Evil Dad

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A Narcissist or TwoNarc

I have not been visible the last few days. A knee jerk reaction, to pull myself away from hurt and hide in my home. I thought that after my son’s death that there wasn’t anything that could hurt me, that there was nothing worse that could happen.

erinkberndt

Loving Mom

There really isn’t, yet more betrayal has really set me back. Seeing as how it took me 2 hrs to tell my life story on a Live Feed. I was content writing my story one chapter at a time & releasing it weekly. I was found by someone who befriended me & when I felt comfortable I agreed to do this.

I have always had anxiety & depression & if you know anything about my life, you can probably understand why. I spent the weeks leading up to that huge step for me, trying to come up w a plan on how to include my life in a defined amount of time. I could not figure out how I was going to do this successfully, when I struggle w self esteem & anxiety, But, I had so much encouragement behind me that I set my mind to getting it done.

As a writer, of course, I wanted to plan & compose the timeline. Yet I knew trying to read my story live would be too awkward. So, I went into it with no plan, except to tell it like it was. I talked for 2 hrs, and I missed a lot. I started fighting & trying to help people almost immediately after my son’s death, I needed a purpose, a meaning to my life. I have tried suicide twice in my life while in my abusive first marriage, I tried overdosing on my medication. the first time, after I took the pills, I called and told someone…….my ex knew, but did nothing. I was taken to the hospital and had to have my stomach pumped. They didn’t take me in for observation because I told them I was leaving the marriage because I knew it was bad when I was willing to take my own life in the house w my children sleeping upstairs.

The second time was after becoming disabled, almost, 10 yrs later, I took an entire bottle of Valium. My ex husband did not call for help he watched me as I became crazy & incoherent & when I went to bed & passed out finally, I prayed for the end. My ex claimed he watched me all night but as an active alcoholic & addict I don’t believe he had enough care in any of himself to pay attention. My kids were home that night & they watched too, no one ever thought to get me help. I gave up caring after that & finally was able to rid myself of my abusive ex within the year.

My reason for this story is this: I was asked to do the live feed, convinced to do it actually. I gave my story freely as a gift.The death of a child is so traumatic, the mind and body are at odds and you lose control over both of them. When you are abused throughout a life filled with one traumatic event after another, You learn to box all of your emotions & memories up in your head & lock them away so that you can continue to move on & function in day to day life.

I went on to do my feed & I had to open & pull down so many emotions & memories. I thought I had done rather well, as I was not doing it for any reason except to raise awareness in every aspect of abuse & addiction I had been through. To share my pain, in the hopes that abused women, might find the courage to leave unhealthy relationships, and above all to think about how that abuse affects children, as well as the tragedy of losing a child to addiction. To help parents become aware of signs, to love but not enable, to help them when they’re ready for help. I did it for the person who asked me too.

Two nights ago the recovery/addiction community was rocked w rumors of betrayal. I checked facts & sources & based upon those, I made the decision to back away from the negativity, because it was about the person I had given my story to, I have been sick since, migraines, no food or sleep. Betrayal cuts deep. Our whole community is affected & hurt. We are warriors though and we will continue to spread our message and offering our assistance.

I learned I had even been called a “bottom feeder” and he complained that I did not show enough emotion for my son. For anyone who first of all has no children and second of all is not with me during my private grieving to say things like that was so painful. however, to learn of the truth behind his intentions has left me and many very shaken.

I thought I was in a good place. Three separate attacks were more than I could handle. I have had a woman who knew me as a child attack me for posting my story, and last night after my video being out for over a week my daughter watched it and launched her attack on me also. She is disgusted in me, a normal frame of mind for her, because I told the truth. She is mad because I made HER look bad. How could I do that to HER? My only biological child. I lament our differences all the time. I have tried over and over trying to prove to this child that I love her. It’s not about me. It never has been for her.

The term I was given to describe the person who had betrayed me (everyone else also affected) was narcissistic. This is actually not the first person I had learned was a Narcissist. My daughter is one. After my son’s death, my daughter’s behavior was so extreme, I did not know how to deal with her, she made my loss completely her own, even though we had all lost someone. She had my mail rerouted to her house for 2 and a half months, so this was how I really could define the complete behavior so completely in so few words. It is titled:

The Narcissist’s Prayer:

That didn’t happen.
And if it did, it wasn’t that bad.
And if it was, it’s not a big deal.
And if it is, that’s not my fault.
And it it was, I didn’t mean it.
And if i did,
It’s Your fault.

And so, that is where I leave it. There are so many different forms of mental illness. It can be easily hidden. Is not discussed enough. It is not easy to detect because the brain changes normal thought processes into manipulation, guile, and deceit. A mentally ill person can live for so many years undetected, until they finally make that fatal mistake that brings their condition, glaring into the Light.

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Confessions from a Blind AddictBlind Women

erinkberndt

SFYB Author

I have a lot to say, I am a grown woman, mother and Grandmother. My life has never been easy & my choices were often poor, but I made them w good intentions. Believing only in myself, not following my gut, and tearing open the scab that covered my never healed wounds from my abused life. I’ve never been one to quit. Yet I did.

I gave up & pulled myself into the virtual existence of a recluse, not just confined to my house, but to my bedroom, only seeing family who came to me or on holidays. I pulled away from all of my friends. I lived in the little bubble I had created for almost 9 years.

It started w the fourth car accident in an 8 week period that followed 2 kidney stone surgeries. All 4 of them were rear enders, I was a passenger in 3 and driver in one. That fourth one was it for my body. I immediately had pain in my arms. and knew something was wrong. After testing they determined I had blown a disc in my neck and needed immediate surgery. I had just gotten a great promotion at work and just wanted the surgery over. I was confident, as I had a pretty deep history of successful surgeries.

Confessions from a Blind Addict Click to Tweet

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I had a metal plate screwed into the front of my spine. It was supposed to be a quick fix but it didn’t work. I tried to go back to work doing extremely light work, but didn’t make it a full week. The pain was insane, headaches, stiff, and miserable. I was still living with my abusive ex husband who did nothing to help me. I tried moving out shortly after the surgery and had to have a second surgery less than 3 mos later. I came out of that surgery even worse, I lost all feeling in my right thumb & fought with my surgeon, later learning he had cut my nerves during surgery and I had almost bled out 3 times on the table. I was told because my neck was so small, that the nerve had been right up against my spinal cord so he could not cauterize or electrocute as they would normally have done.

I had to go back to my ex because I couldn’t live on my own. I was now on so many medications, which I had no ill effects and never questioned the prescriptions I took daily. Before the accidents, I had already had several health issues arise. HBP, anxiety, depression and high cholesterol. Heart disease killed my father at 51. The only bad things I inherited from that hateful child abuser.

After surgery added to Lisinopril, simvastatin, Valium and Cymbalta, were Neurontin, Flexeril, percocet 10’s, and Lidocaine patches for lower back issues. I always followed my med list and took only as prescribed, my marriage finally ended and I thought life was going to improve. It did for awhile and I met and married my current husband and I began raising his 2 young children 10 & 12 at the time. Their mother neglected them and partied leaving them to experiment, be abused and ultimately fall apart.

I have two children of my own and they were grown, my oldest, my daughter, lived on and off with us and my son was sinking into a life of drugs.

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I started pulling myself out of the world, I ended up w 3 children all in active addiction and my world narrowed down to therapy, hospital visits, and traumatized children. My health declined and I gained weight. The Dr. added to my list Meclizine for dizziness and Vitamin D3, I had to up my pain medication from just Percocet to Percocet and oxycontin. I still took only as prescribed and the Dr ended up switching me from oxycontin to Morphine and Fioricet for migraines. I took 2 Morphine 30 mg tabs a day and a Percocet at night and the Fioricet as needed.

Except, as my world narrowed so did my desire to be awake. My son severed 3 fingers and a thumb in Dec 2013. The Nurse at the hospital told me he had admitted to Heroin use and had Hepatitis C. He had given me a beautiful grandson in 2009, Two years after that first surgery, Aiden arrived.So I had one on Heroin, a cutter and an alcoholic, pill user. Never once questioning myself.

In March of 2106. 3 overwhelming events took place in 3 days. First I had run into my son in the cemetery behind my house and I was with my daughter and Aiden,and my youngest grandson, from my daughter. We talked and had a nice chat. My son and my grandson’s Mom had been unable to care for him and they were young so Aiden’s maternal grandmother has custody. I had Aiden every week and it was up to me who on our side of the family was allowed to see him. I hadn’t been told that my son couldn’t see Aiden anymore. Later that night when I told his grandmother that we had run into my son I was forbidden from seeing him again. The day after that on my sons 25th birthday I went to my neurologist and was at 213 lbs, on a CPAP at night because i stopped breathing 80 times an hour , I was told if I didn’t make a serious change in my life

Florida sign

I wasn’t going to be around much longer. Those 3 events pushed me into moving from MA to FL, the day after.I was sleeping 20 hrs a day and still taking all my meds as prescribed in those 4 hrs and still not questioning myself.

On Aug 27th, I was not feeling right, restless, anxious and………..
I couldn’t sleep, I never had the ringer on my phone on, because I did not want to face reality, At 12;13 am on Sunday morning Aug 28th, my world imploded as my phone began to ring. My son was unresponsive and on the way to the hospital, I knew he was already gone.

The pain of losing a child is not describable there are simply no words. My husband was still in the house in MA because my stepson was on probation and in treatment. My stepdaughter, only 3 weeks out of her last hospitalization lived with me.

I turned to God immediately. he gave us sign after sign. I went through physical and mental Hell that week. My body would accept nothing and kept pouring out everything. I could not sleep and had to fly to MA completely dehydrated, I stayed that way until the following Sunday when GOD TOOK OVER, on the brink of death, completely off of the meds because there had been no sense trying to take them.
I was physically and mentally, completely and utterly, transformed in the next 3 weeks…………Transcended actually…………….To Be Continued

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The Abuse within Addiction

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erinkberndt

SFYB Author

I’ve seen some articles written lately on a topic that seems to have been left out of the backlash of living with addiction. My ex husband & I both came from abusive homes with fathers who were alcoholics & held women in a very low regard.

Looking back, of course, 29 yrs later, I can so plainly see what I didn’t then. That we were poison before we even met & our childhoods contributed heavily to us following what was for us, normal. The relationship just should never have happened, there were enough signs, but all that dysfunction had me thinking I had found

The One. oh, Dear Lord, how I wished I had followed those signs. The first time he kissed me was awful, honestly, it was the worst kiss ever, no chemistry. Yet I continued on to sex and that’s where he had me.He left me alone to sleep alone after he got me pregnant. Lived w me after she was born, claiming he was not my boyfriend, even though we were living & sleeping together. He said he loved me a lot in the very beginning and even though he told me he didn’t love me, I convinced myself differently.

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We got married 3 yrs later & what had always been a rocky relationship became my hellish reality. He wasn’t really around much too much drinking & cheating, some nightd he never came home. When he was around there were violent fights, things always got broken, the most common was the phone cord to call for help.
By this time, he had me convinced I was fat, stupid, ugly & lazy. I knew I wasn’t any of those things, yet when you’re told your whole life screwed up things, your mind becomes screwed up.

Codependence. We will not leave, we can not leave. We are terrified & truly convinced we are unlovable. In my case it was his love for our daughter that held me prisoner, I had never had my father’s love & she had both of her parents. Then Anthony came along he had no interest in his son, only our daughter. He wasn’t abusive to the kids he only abused me, while they watched as he twisted my daughter’s mind into believing that I was jealous of her because he loved her more. I tried explaining to her that the love he had for us was supposed to be different & that I stayed for that reason, to no avail.

At one time we lost our kids to Dept of Social Services. My aunts had been reporting us for years. This was when I had joined into the heavy drinking. We were having nightly parties, my ex was doing coke and I just wanted out. I just had no way to go. There were restraining orders, I had left once and he followed right behind, always promising to change.

Things were bad, really bad. By now with my drinking I had begun to fight back. He would pull the wires out of car so I couldn’t leave, & always the phone lines were cut. He was a very tough guy. Strong & mean. Infamous in the tiny shitty town we lived in. He was always in a fight, no one ever dared to press charges, except a couple but nothing happened.

He did terrible things that he would only confess too when completely drunk, one time a couple small kittens disappeared, at first he claimed to know nothing, until one night when he wanted to hit me as low as he could, he told me he had taken the kittens up the mountain to the farm & threw them out & the vultures had grabbed them. was horrified. The next day the story changed to “he had driven way out of his way to drop them off in an elderly project. I am not a stupid person by any means, but I was so fucking stupid.

This was me nightmare for 22 yrs, along with many health issues and no help after major surgeries, I really believed he was hoping I would just die. Just like I wished he would too.
When the state took the kids we got therapy & stopped drinking for 4 yrs. They were the only 4 yrs that weren’t terror filled, yet we still fought.

He became obsessed with traveling and had become a closet drunk on pain pills & completely crazy, so lost there were most nights he didn’t remember, I, of course, did. He was forced to take anger management classes twice from restraining orders I had gotten trying to escape. Yes, I tried. But, inside I was still his property, inside I rationalized it a million different ways, I made a million and one excuses for him.
Until that final straw, that one thing that changes everything, for me, it came with restraining order #6.

Now 22 yrs into the relationship in 2009, our daughter is 21 and working a job making $40 a week, no motivation to do anything, our son was 18 & had gotten his 15 yr old girlfriend pregnant, and I had been disabled in 4 car accidents in an 8 week span that left me needing neck surgery. after the 2nd surgery I was disabled. My daughter harbored so much hatred toward me that she had pushed me backwards down a flight of stairs from a full run, luckily my ex caught me. He had begun taking our sons adderall and convinced our son to stop taking it. This is when my ex began drinking & smoking with our son at 15, so at 18, he was in and out of the house, selling pot for his uncle and slowly sinking away.

One day in early June Anthony, our son was at the house with his girlfriend & my ex caught them having sex, a fist fight ensued and I called the police I put a restraining order on him & had every intention to end it. I didn’t renew the restraining order when it expired after a month. That night stayed up way late, had the house barricaded as best as I could, finally when I had to go to bed I shut off the lights and went to bed. Five minutes later and he was back in, a wake of smashed doors behind him. He pointed out it was his house too & there was nothing I could do. I was stuck again.

On June 10th 2009, he came home out of his mind, he was screaming at me, but not at me, he thought I was some guy from work, this was not the first time this had happened.There were many of those nights, one night he almost killed me by choking me on our kitchen floor, thinking i was some scumbag drug dealer. He went upstairs & completely tore up our bedroom door, when he came back downstairs and continued his drunken tirade. I called the police…….again.

When the cop was talking to me, he made this statement “Erin, this is the 6th restraining order, you’ve had. when you gonna let one stick”. That was my moment. I kept that order on him for 2 yrs. I met my soul mate, one month after I got rid of the dead weight.

I understand his addiction more today & realize he will never get help & be the same person. The point is you do not need to be a slave to addiction or domestic violence. Help is always a phone call away. If you’re waiting for a man to save you, you will only find a man exactly like you have. Letting go of the past is hard but absolutely necessary. You need to value yourself, love yourself enough to change your expectations in life. There is a whole world you miss in a violent life & also locked in addiction. We are WORTH it, just as worth it as every other person on the planet.

Don’t stay in a bad marriage for all the wrong reasons. I did. I worried life would’ve been worse on my children f I had left. My son is now dead and my daughter isn’t speaking to me. Now I would also like to point out this is just as true for men caught in violent relationships, with abusive women. Abuse is NOT love.

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Let The Hate Flow Through You

erinkberndt

SFYB Author

Today’s musings are something I hate to even need to address. We are full swing into attacking addiction and gaining enough momentum to actually make an impact and begin dropping the numbers of death attributed to this much misunderstood Disease. Yes, DISEASE, the Surgeon General has made it official. That puts so much of the stigma added to addiction into a whole new light.

Now that we KNOW addiction is a disease, there are still those people who can just not grasp it as fact. I have seen people say “well. I just don’t understand it”. Yet, do you understand, Cancer, Diabetes, Lupus, or any of the other thousands of diseases? Not without extensive education, you don’t.

This is what our movement is all about; raising awareness & helping to educate those interested in learning, as well as those who steadfastly push us away. Our main goal is to save the unnecessary deaths that are raging out of control. Having addiction finally recognized for what it is, should start opening doors for easier ways to get treatment. Hopefully it will also, give us the power to now effectively educate the younger generations before they ever decide to experiment.

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It is a sad fact that there are far too many of us that have had addiction touch us personally, whether we were raised in it, had a close family member or friend, or even ourselves. Addiction is prevalent in this world right now.

I think that we are very lucky to have social media to help spread the message, to reach out to those who are feeling hopeless and prove to them that recovery is 100% possible and achievable. The recovery community is strong and very widespread, thanks to facebook, instagram, the world wide web. We can reach so many people with very little effort.

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This all should be a good thing. There should be dancing in the streets, those who have been ashamed of their addiction should be able to confidently state “ I am an addict & I need help’. PERIOD!!! We know what it is, we understand why it happens & we know it is NOT a choice. I pray I never hear the words “they chose to do it, they deserved to die”, ever again in my life.

In my case the words spoken were “why is everyone crying, when they knew this was coming”, as at the hospital the Dr’s were fervently trying to pound life back into my 25 yr old son. The attempt was unsuccessful and the knife in my heart spoken by my daughters boyfriend as she hovered over her dead brother’s body, uttered to my husband who had been there through it all. I feel disgust for this person, I forgive his ignorance but also worry for his own sister is a Heroin addict also. He himself an alcoholic. His behavior and dress for the wake and funeral and lack of support to my daughter was almost inhumane.

She was raised amidst my own bouts w alcohol, depression, anxiety, pot, coke & being mentally, physically and emotionally abused. Her father is an alcoholic and very bad addict. She has not broken the cycle yet.
To help get our messages out easier, the invention of going Live on Facebook Has provided a platform for us to share our stories, along with our real emotions. It is far more impactful than trying to read a very long story. So much technology, fewer & fewer have the time to dedicate to a book, but social media has changed everything.

Hand holding a pen over paper.

I had been writing my story, very slowly, letting out a chapter a week. I started out this way and was fine continuing on this way, because I had so many confessions to make that it did not feel like I was throwing myself out there bare, to face the criticism I was expecting. It was during this time that everyone began telling their stories live. I have been embroiling myself very deeply in the addiction/recovery community, and was finding support and understanding where I wasn’t finding it from the people I would’ve expected it from.

I was found by William Marotta of Choose Freedom, he had started airing a person’s story each night. He convinced me to do it. So, on January 2nd at 7pm I went Live, I spent 2 hours talking and still have plenty more to talk about ( if you would like to watch it, check Choose Freedom or my own facebook page).

My problems began last night with a post to my page stating that I had no right to tell MY life story on the “www.” At first I was furious and I would usually have closed in and cut the person to pieces. I began to respond when I reconsidered and pulled myself back & asked God to handle it for me. The message I ended up sending stated that she needed to educate herself, that it seemed she was harboring some anger & hate, and that she needed to find God. As it is my page & my life, it was of no concern to her. She is a 66 yr old woman that knew me when I was a small girl whose father hated her & beat the crap out of her simply because she existed. Other than that I do not know her.

I was happy with my response & expected it to end with that. She wasn’t done, she then told me I was helping no one, that I did not know God & that she had helped far more people in her life than I would ever touch, (one life touched is enough for me). I went on to other things when my notifications started lighting up, my family & friends had come to the rescue & tore her up. I tried to calm the fray, but chose not to be mean and avoided pulling out the me, that can drop someone to their knees with my choice of wording (it’s a gift)…….I thought it was over.

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A few minutes later more notifications and another attack, this time telling me how disgusting I was sharing my story to make people feel sorry for me. I am a warrior of God, I don’t need pity. I let the family & friends have at it & just tried to remain aloof. It was then God pointed out to me that I had already answered why she was reacting this way. She blocked me & then sent another request so I accepted it, maybe this was over????

Nope, this morning the comment. “Proud of your friends? mine are better” was on my page & she was already being eaten alive by my protectors. I went on her page. What I learned there turned my feelings of anger into pity……For HER. Her marriage was abusive, I don’t know how long she endured it, but there were no posts from friends, only lonely posts & game achievements. The post that caught my eye was about how a few of her friends from her old job had reached out to her, so her husband had been wrong in telling her that she had no friends.

When I asked God to answer for me, he as always showed me the truth. You see after my son died, I thought I was next, I couldn’t have been farther from the truth. Instead I was chosen by God. He healed me & gifted me in so many different ways. HE is the reason I am doing what I am doing, He has been gently(sometimes not so gently, if I’m not paying attention) guiding me to fulfill my destiny. To help others heal & find the truth in God Himself.

So, to all of you throwing negativity and hatred in our direction, know that it will be met, with answers from us……God’s Warriors!!!!

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alph-dogThe Movie Alpha Dog

What makes some give up & others the drive to change the world?
erinkberndt

SFYB Author

Has anyone seen the movie Alpha Dog? If not it’s a true story in which a young hard core addict owes his dealer $1200 . So the dealer kidnaps the guys little brother. He is seen by 39 people while being held. Actually developing what the 15yr old thought were friendships. They took him all over the place. The guy watching him keeps giving him the chance to escape.

The teen decides to stay so that his brother won’t get in any more trouble & he knows his brother will pay it. When the brother refuses to pay off his debt the dealer orders the child’s death. They make him hike up a hill to where his grave is already dug, they blindfold & bind him, slam him in the back of the head w a shovel & then shoot him. They close in the end of the movie w the Mom, who was beautiful, thin & young before this happened, now blown up, unkempt woman in a psych ward.

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She is a complete wreck, her son died for $1200,because his brother wouldn’t tell them what was really going on. I’ve seen this movie a million times, as sad as it is, I like the actors. I watched it a few weeks ago, now w a new perception of the ending.
As the mother gives her side of the story you realize she’s institutionalized, & she slips into madness. Watching this I realized as it hit me like a brick; that could’ve so easily been me. I could’ve made different choices.

That first night I had been awake since the previous morning so approximately 36 hrs w no sleep, while I was walking along the highway trying to burn energy. My gaze kept going from the skies to the huge trucks that kept passing, if my son had faced death, there was no reason why I couldn’t do the same. But I didn’t do it.

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On Monday, I was complaining to my husband that there’d been no response from God yet. Yes, I really thought I should’ve had my sign already. So he tells me to watch my bird feeders for a new bird because he knows Anthony & I used to watch the birds at our feeders in the mornings when he was young. I need to interject at this point, I had been awake for all but 2hrs of sleep since that Saturday morning til Monday night. I could not keep anything at all in my body. I was violently ill from everywhere. I was also sickly & so weak previous to this.

I got another 2hrs Monday night, actually early Tues morning & went to have my tea & *down swooped my very first wild bald eagle as it soared over the lake along the surface, I knew immediately that was my sign. When I talked to my daughter later that day, she said “omg, mom. We were out for a ride yesterday & there was an eagle over the car”…… 1200 miles away. On Wednesday my 6yr old grandson (Anthony’s son) saw it at his bus stop & on Wednesday Ant’s gf saw it 20 miles from where my daughter & grandson were.

That solidified my belief in God. I was still sick, I was getting calls from MA, forcing me to attend the wake & funeral. I had no money & my ex assured me his family was covering all expenses. I was so grateful for that. There was no way I could’ve paid, & definitely not my ex. But I was harassed by my ex’s sister, telling me how bad I looked to everyone & what a shitty person I was. I was so sick & dehydrated, but I had to go. On Tuesday & Wednesday. I repented all of my sins & forgave everyone I felt had ever wronged me. This great big weight was lifted from my shoulders that I no longer felt, it had been there so long. I made personal apologies to everyone, but most choose to not be in my life & that’s 100% OK w me. I needed to do that to move on.

timthumb

On Thursday I flew “home” to Mass, because I still could keep nothing down or in, I collapsed in the airport trying to get to my connecting flight. I had to be cleared by the EMT’s to fly on. I got into town w 3 hours to spare. Sick to be in my house 25’ from my backyard in MA is the cemetery. I coincidentally had met my son in the cemetery just before I moved. It was me, his sister, his son & his nephew. That’s the last time I saw him alive & when we parted ways it was w an I Love You from all of us to all of us. I was OK not attending these forced services I had no hand in arranging & so I just followed what had been set up. The first sight of my son’s body hit me like bricks dropped from a skyscraper & I dropped to my knees. I had a lot of family support, my aunt & cousins I hadn’t seen in yrs, my brother, my sister-in-law, close friends. It was a very large turnout.

My son lay there for all of those there to see, dead at 25.They cried the tears, they appeared to mourn. Yet the shit that took place, was so typical for that small dirty evil town. No one cared while he was alive, he was called names, ignored by the family & just never important to them.

Ant’s cousin is , who is also rumored to be on Heroin, did a deal at the wake. My ex was trying to score percocet for himself & Ant’s gf who was at that point 4 days into withdrawal. He was also trying to take her mother home w him, since his own girlfriend had to put her 3yr old to bed.

The “best” part of the night though for me was when I had gone outside looking for a friend & was told that this drunk “relative”, you know the type, mom’s friend ends up family. She didn’t know me or my ex & she most definitely did not know my son. She caused a scene in front of his casket, then progressed to driving by the funeral home & swearing & sticking up her middle finger. When I came out she had parked just a house up from us. I approached her & asked her to leave. She went crazy & tried to storm the funeral home. I had to have the police called.

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His service the next afternoon was beautiful I had decided I did not want to see him lowered into the ground, but tongues immediately began wagging, horrible mother, mean, evil, crazy.

Call me what you want I had already had my good bye in that cemetery in March. That is how I choose to remember my son. My ex’s family had everything removed from his plot….. Granite edging, toys I had put there from Aiden, trinkets, the money. Gofundme was set up & money taken by an aunt, an education fund set up, that has never been mentioned again. Everything my son owned that should have gone to my grandson was whisked away & hidden by my daughter & ex.

I left MA w no regrets that I would be away from the hellish drama. Florida is home now. I lay down to try & get some sleep, on the night that marked a week, Sunday. I lay down exhausted & closed my eyes.
That was the moment God took over!!!

Now back to Alpha Dog & that poor mother, some of us get the shit beaten out of us & just stay down. Not me, I have prayed for mental breakdown, it would certainly explain my experiences a whole lot easier. But, that is not what I am made of & God knew this when he healed me & gave me the ideas, the motivation, the drive & passion, to put it all out there. To dedicate myself to helping others & trying to change addiction/recovery stigma. This girl is on fire!!!
Thank you
Erin Berndt

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  • Holiday Survival at Toxic Family & Office Festivities StopFryingYourBrain.com becoming most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here and learn more. If you are serious about making it through the holidays still clean and...
  • Beware of “Blackout Wednesday” By: Allie Holbrook Thanksgiving.  A day for gratitude, but also a time of excess.  Tables groan with turkey and pumpkin pie, wine flows freely, and there’s a sense that nothing bad...
  • Hope Without Handcuffs @StopFryingBrain By: Robert Henslee SFYB Founder To all my brothers and sisters I would like to introduce you to Hope Without Handcuffs. Working with law enforcement across the nation, great organizations like Families...
  • Thank You Mom, For Never Giving Up On Me BY:Katie Donovan, National Director of Family Advocacy, Reliance Treatment Center For so long, I never understood how my mom stuck by my side. After all of...
  • Big Pharma Wants To Shut You Down… @StopFryingBrain Help us spread the word about the liberty movement, we’re reaching millions help us reach millions more. Don’t let corporate America dictate your freedom of speech on...
  • You’re too Stupid To Figure Out What’s Fake News and What’s Not…. Alex Jones breaks down the vast web of lies the media continues to spin in order to discredit Donald Trump, after he has...
  • No Matter how many women on the job… It still takes 9 months to have a baby…. Hello, my name is Robert Henslee. For those you that don’t know me, I am an avid Internet...
  • We are an “organic” social media community marketing content model. Come join our marketing effort today!  StopfryingYourBrain.com becoming one of the most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation. Learn why below we are a...
  • 5 Signs of Addiction for Seniors Other relevant articles you may be interested in; 1) Opiate Dependence among the Elderly 2) Elderly Addicted to Opiates 3) 5 Signs of Addiction for Seniors 4) Things Are...
  • Addiction a Disease? Or Learned Behavior? StopFryingYourBrain.com becoming most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here and learn more. Yo big dogs listen up. My name is “FUBAR”. If you don’t know what that means...
  • Muscle-bound millionaire of addiction treatment under scrutiny By Christine Stapleton – Palm Beach Post Staff Writer Expensive cars. Flashy watches. Strip clubs. Casinos. Tattoos. Selfies of ripped biceps and b-boy stances. This is the lifestyle...
  • What is Addiction Really, and How do We Fix it? MD Lukens, PhD  © May, 2016 The Disease Model is Not Well Constructed To start this discussion off I need to repeat what I’ve been...
  • The Art Of Enabling…And I Was The Master! Ok, I know what you’re thinking….Oh LAWD, another article on enabling! And well, yes, I guess it is….but I’m not going to tell you what to do,...
  • First Responders having Addiction Training My name is TJ McWain and I am a police officer in Southern New Jersey.  As a police officer, I come into contact with substance abusers on a daily basis...
  • Fort Lauderdale and Atlantic Shores Hospitals would like to extend our hand We at Fort Lauderdale and Atlantic Shores Hospitals would like to extend our hand in helping you and your patients receive the best...
  • Treating Post-Acute Withdrawal Symptoms Dr. Cali Estes, of The Addictions Academy, has teamed up with Dr. Kenneth Blum, creator of Synaptamine to provide a new class that focuses on Reward Deficiency Syndrome and Post Acute...
  • CBD Oil Now Legal In All 50 States Strains of Marijuana that are Most Effective to Detox a Client from Opiates Strains of Marijuana that are most effective to detox a client from Opiates and...
  • Stop Patient Brokering In Your Facility Cold The Addictions Academy announced that they are offering a class to combat the rampant patient brokering going on in the addiction treatment industry. Dr. Cali Estes, of The...
  • Who Is YOUR Therapist? One of the reasons I made the decision to become a consultant was my desire to properly inform treatment center owners and CEOs after witnessing several being misled. I recently had...
  • Addiction specialist Cali Estes joins Dr. Drew Addiction specialist Cali Estes joins Dr. Drew to talk about her work with high profile people in managing and overcoming their addictions. Dr. Estes tell’s Drew about the...
  • Addiction NOT a disease… MD Lukens, Ph.D.   © 2016  Not a Disease The way I see it, addiction is NOT a disease.  It’s something else entirely.   However, as is the case with alcohol addiction,...
  • Great FB Groups @ Pages For Addiction I’ve been working with the best support people/groups in the addiction vertical on Facebook for a number of years now. All the groups (below) are some of the...
  • Say You Want To Help People With Addiction? The Addictions Academy was founded to increase education in the areas of addiction that have been previously unavailable to the general public. We offer on site training,...
  • Do’s and Dont’s When Opening A Treatment Center Though I am eager to help those interested in opening a treatment center/facility, there are some important things I tell my investors and CEOs to consider before...
  • United Health Law Suit vs. Sky Toxicology – Patient Brokering Breaking Down the United Health Law Suit vs. Sky Toxicology, Frontier Toxicology, numerous other labs, treatment centers and individual owners AND DOES 1-150. Case Number:...
  • Katie Donovan Named Executive Vice President of Families Against Narcotics  Other relevant posts: (1) My Daughter the Addict-A Suburban Mom’s Nightmare (2) Families Against Narcotics Announces Run Drugs out of Town Event (3) No One...
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  • Prince. It’s a name that everyone knows, whether you liked him or not. He made an unforgettable name for himself with his signature eclectic fashion, wild dance moves, & flashy hair & makeup. While some...
  • Pain Pill’s the Addiction. Food for thought and advice… Hello, my name is DRUGS – I destroy homes, tear families apart, take your children, and that’s just the start. I’m more costly than diamonds, more...
  • Hi my name is Organized Crime. Friends, supporters and users, of my products and services, call me OC and my middle names are corruption and immorality. I see that you are a supporter and user so...
  • Patient Brokering Kickbacks Lawsuits and Jail… Are You Next? If you have a facility/practice you need to look at this. Click on the posts to read articles. ..
  • When I was 15 years old and my Grandfather passed away of cancer. @StopFryBrain Friends and family brought over casseroles, pies, and lasagnas. Warm cookies left on the porch and neighborly visits of talks and...
  • The Friend Who Introduced Me to My Undoing I was 18 when I met the person who would introduce me to my ultimate undoing, Oxycontin. His name was Miles. I was outside smoking a cigarette...
  •   I am a aggressive Internet marketer (Certified Master Coach Internet Marketing) with 40+ years experience that specializes in the drug and alcohol vertical markets. Look at my endorsements above from executives in the drug...
  • How Do You Find A Good Rehab? By: Steve Castleman It takes courage to break through denial and begin to consider getting professional help. It may start with a glimpse, a fleeting flash of willingness....
  • Exposing the FDA StopFryingYourBrain.com becoming most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here and learn more. There is also an excellent companion clip to this one which may be found by clicking here Wa...
  • Got Empty Beds at Your Facility? Updates and more discussion on this topic please join our FaceBook Group by clicking on image below. StopFryingYourBrain.com one of the most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click...
  • Stop Frying Your Brain Our Capabilities Please join our network of over 250 facility operators ! stopfryingyourbrain.com one of the most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here to learn more Do you...
  • Lost In Limbo? Hey if you need a friend and some help reach out to me Robert @ 772.206.6676 If you’re a service provider and wish to become a member of our network call John...
  • Is Your Landlord Partially Responsible for Your Relapse? This website is becoming the most visited substance abuse site in the nation. Click here to learn more I saw an article on allergy testing as it...
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  • A Day in the Life of a Crack Dealer. Think about this for a while… Stop being so dam stupid. Be Smart. You have a choice. VOTE: While You Still Can! Donald Trump? StopFryingYourBrain.com becoming...
  • How PTSD Leads To Addiction. If you need some help your in the right place. StopFryingYourBrain.com becoming most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here and learn more. How PTSD Leads To Addiction. Today...
  • 5 Things You Need to Know About Living With PTSD. If you need some help your in the right place. StopFryingYourBrain.com becoming most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here and learn more. PTSD...
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  • 50 Pounds of Marijuana Shipped to Wrong Address You Should Join You Should Join to learn about the best digital marketing for the drug and alcohol vertical? Click the button below. LinkedIn Groups You Should...
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  • stopfryingyourbrain.com one of the most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here to learn more   We are looking for the best books to recommend to our user community. If you are an...
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  • Members of Congress, the Betty Ford Foundation, the Christi Foundation and Many Others Meet to Discuss Opiate Deaths Today. Click on the image below to join our automated drug, alcohol training and marketing series if...
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  • stopfryingyourbrain.com one of the most viewed Substance Abuse sites in the nation click here to learn more When someone talk about the long-term consequences of war, let’s talk about the men and women who came...
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  • Faith in Recovery  Click image below to visit our FB page
  • Faith in recovery USA Connections Welcome to United Churches Against Addiction. We consist of many subchapters. Currently we have two active subchapters, Faith in Recovery UK, Faith In Recovery USA. This is the USA subchapter....
  • Faith in recovery UK Connections Welcome to United Churches Against Addiction is a one stop shop providing support for people struggling with addictions by connecting them with local churches and quality specialised groups and centres suited...
  • United Churches Against Addiction – UCAA Welcome to United Churches Against Addiction. United churches against addiction is the parent organization of churches around the world whose purpose is to share resources and information with those...
  • Humbly United Brave souls are we who have waged a great war within ourselves and emerged victorious upon surrender, this is the axiom for which we lay a foundation that will bear the weight of...

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