J. Bella

SFYB Staff Writer

Dealing with Pushy Boozers & Surrounded By Assholes

By: J. Bella

Last night was a big night for me. Not because it was Friday, but because I was sober and surrounded by drunk people.

This is not an ideal situation, especially for the newly sober. And it’s certainly not fun. I ended up defending myself incessantly, while the people around me kept trying to push booze on me. Ugh!

ass holes

You’ve been there before, too. We all have.

Most of the individuals in our party decided, because I was not fun, I couldn’t be their friend, and I would probably divorce my spouse because I was no longer drinking.

Really? Was drinking the only reason we married? Not!

How to Deal With Pushy Boozers When You’re Newly Sober

Dealing with Pushy Boozers Click to Tweet

1.) Know that pushy boozers are ONLY concerned with themselves.
They don’t care if you’re drinking or not. They just don’t want your sobriety to affect their night.

2.) Be prepared with an excuse if you’re not to the point on your recovery journey where you feel comfortable being honest with these people. Tell them you’re taking medication, or you’re fasting for your health, or your company is doing a drug test in the morning, or you’re preparing for a sports event early the next day.

3.) If they still persist, it may be time to find new friends. This is when I feel arriving late to a party and leaving early are necessary steps in your sobriety.

A_end friends

Of course, good friends are those who support you, even if your lifestyle choices don’t match theirs anymore.

Those who can’t support your sobriety are most likely drinking friends. You came together because you both liked to drink and get drunk. That was your common goal and all you had in common. Time to move on.

Each of us (addicts or not) drop old friends and add new ones as we grow and change throughout our lives. It’s normal and healthy.


How to Surround Yourself with Good Friends

Your criteria should be: is this person a nourishing friend? If so, keep an old friendship and cherish it. If not, drop the old friend and move on.

As you progress in your sobriety, you’ll meet new sober friends. Use the same criteria with them. Eventually, you’ll be surrounded by people who support you and enhance the quality of your life as you do theirs.

Now that’s a good time!





J. Bella
J. Bella is a 31-year old small business owner, living in Pennsylvania. She has been on her sober journey for 8 months, managing 90 days of sobriety before falling and starting again. She writes about the ups and downs of sobriety, as she keeps moving forward to where she wants to be. She knows she is better sober and hopes her journey will help and inspire others to achieve 100% sobriety, too.

Filed under: Alcoholic StoriesAlcoholismRecoverySober Survival